S4 timing chain

Oh how to even begin to tell you about my recent tale of woe. Up until 2 months ago, my s4 cab was the best car I ever owned for the last 3 years running. Bought it with 63k miles and it now has 89k. Man did my family have a blast. Constant state of Perm-a-grin was my driving experience for 3 awesome years, bragging to my audi weary friends about how this particular audi has a "no-maintenance" timing chain instead of a belt that costs 2k to change every 75 to 100k. And now... I have fully devoured my words of pride and the Permagrin is no more. My best car ever is just taking up space in my driveway, no longer deserving the garage. The 3 year honeymoon ended at 89k miles when I started it up one morning and it idled like half the spark plugs were failing, accompanied by an engine light. Then the light started blinking. Then I had it hauled on a flatbed to audi where they gave me the news that my timing adjusters are stuck in an advanced orientation. PRICE TAG = $12,000 to completely replace the timing chain/adjuster/tensioning "system". Parts are $6.5K and labor is $5.5k. This particular audi dealer charges $145 per hour and yet the parts are still more. So this poorly designed timing system (that contains some plastic parts that are prone to fail) will cost more than the value of the car to repair. If you buy the parts indirectly, you might get them as low as $3k. If you can find someone competent that will even take on the job, they might do the labor for $4k. And of course, the zero clearance top end of the motor needs to be checked out to make sure it wasn't damaged from the malfunction, which might cost the unsuspecting ex-joyrider even more. And just to find out how bad the motor is inside, you are in at least $2k at the dealer. I think it is about $3k just to drop it out the bottom. It is pointless to go on. But man was that car fun. When my oldest son turned 10, we did a father/son trip to go pick up my ebay purchase down in NC. But all in all, that car was worth it. Just wish there was an affordable way to get it going again. To help me through my great loss during my prolonged middle age crisis, I bought a used 2010 s4 sedan with MT. It is a gas, but sure miss the top down fun we used to have. DON'T BUY A V8 S4 unless you can find one that is like mine that you can buy for $6k with a plan to fix it. They are ticking time bombs.