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Pull the vacuum line off of the fuel PSI regulator and see if it is full of fuel. This is one way to see if the regulator diaphragm is leaking. If there is not fuel in the vacuum line, it still could be bad, but I would then check to see if the cold start injector is leaking. Let us know what you find.
You will need a scan tool to diag this issue. Any codes? Check the wiring and connector at the speed sensor and make sure they are all good. I would also check the wiring/connectors at the ECM. If you can do it, disconnect the ECM connectors and look for beant/misaligned pins. Check to make sure the weather strip is on the connectors and there is no water or other fluid intrusion. NOTE: Scan for codes and write them down BEFORE disconnecting the ECM or you'll lose them. Post results here.
The P0300, p0302, and p0303 codes are all misfire codes, and the p0137 is an HO2S low voltage (or lean) code. It is normal to have a system lean code with misfires. If the car does this consistently, it should be easy to find. Check the coil(s) for corrosion. If you find none, good. Then you need to test the injectors. If you do not have a scan tool that will do an injector balance test, then you should take it to a shop for this. Pull your spark plugs out again and do a simple compression test before worrying about the injectors. If any cylinders have low compression, take to a shop for a cylinder leak down test (unless you have an air compressor and leak down tester). Have you had any overheating problems or white smoke out the tailpipe?
When you say no lights work, are you referring to the interior (ie. dash or cluster lights) or exterior or both? Get a test light and check your fuses first, then answer the question I just posted to you for further daig.
There are many different tools to do that job. There are longer 5/8 spark plug sockets that you can put a wrench on the end of, there are "universal" or "wobbly" spark plug sockets, different styles of extensions you can use. I personally use a double wobbly socket and long extension and raise the vehicle a little bit and come in with a long extension through the wheel well opening.
How hot? What does the temp guage show? Do you see any leaks or puddles on the ground after you park it and return to the vehicle? Do you smell coolant when you are outside the vehicle? Which engine do you have in the vehicle (4 or 6 cylinder)?
Don't try to bypass it. Not a good idea. You need to clarify something for me though. When the car won't start, does it crank over normally? If you have a No Crank condition, you need to check the basics first. Battery, Voltage drop the battery cables, Ignition switch Signal to starter, Starter Relay, and Starter. If you have good signal on the purple wire to the starter everytime you hit the key but it won't crank, you need a starter. If you have no signal at all, it could be an anti-theft problem (is the security or other theft indicator light on or flashing when it won't start?) or even the transmission range switch, but most likely it is either the Starter relay, ignition switch or possible high resistance or a break in the wire. Try using a DVOM instead of a testlight. If you get voltage (greater than .5 V) on the purple wire at all, it is not the transmission range switch or anti-theft system. You can eliminate one test quickly. Remove the starter relay and replace it with another relay from the electrical box that has the same number on top of it and is in a system that you know works. If it still does the same thing, it is not the relay. Let me know the results of the tests I've given here.
You need a scan tool to go in and look at the I/M Data and see if the monitors have all run. I don't know how many of the monitors TX requires to be passed for inspection, but in CA you can only get by with 1 not being run. There is no set number of miles, it goes by drive cycles and whether the conditions for running each monitor are met during the drive cycle. I have seen it take as many as 25 drive cycles (which equals about 25 days) depending on where/how/how far you drive, weather conditions, fuel tank level, etc. Email me and I will see about sending you the I/M drive cycle chart for running all the monitors. ChevyASE@aol.com
If you do not have access to a scan tool (not a code scanner) you cannot fix this issue at home. You need to look at door positions and after repairs, re-center/reset/relearn the door positions. You can take the dash out and remove the whole HVAC box and open it up and check to make sure that the foam seals inside are all in place and that doors aren't sticking, but a scan tool is required to reset the door actuators and clear any codes stored after re-assembly. Reccommend taking it to a qualified shop.